No matter who you're shopping for, Maxine has the perfect gift!
For the whole family to enjoy Zenith Chromacolor Television - $569 at Chic Myers' House of Television Stores
I love that television screens are getting bigger (25 inches!) while consoles are getting smaller. Of course the picture is in color, but there's the added bonus of a remote control. No more getting off the divan to change the channel or fighting over who gets to watch what. "Mother has the remote and we're all watching the Engelbert Humperdinck Variety Hour!"
For the hunky husband who needs a little push towards something fashionable His-n-Hers Vest Suits - $20 at J.C. Pennys
If your man is like mine, he's not always so sure how to best dress himself. The solution is simple: Dress him like you! What better way to show the world that you're a couple. No, make that a stylish couple.
Helpful hint: J.C. Penny's offers three whole pages of husband/wife matching outfits in their delightful 1970 Christmas Catalog.
For the teenager on Santa's "nice" list
Electrohome Apollo 711 Stereo available at Recordland
This looks marvelous! (Or as the kids say, "marvy!") The space-age design is perfect for getting groovy with your rock-n-roll music. Invite your friends over for a hootenanny.
Mom & Dad will like that this comes with a headphone jack so they don't have to hear any moaning or screeching from that garbage you call music.
For the little girl you are determined to send off to college
Remco Baby Laugh-a-Lot $12.99 at Sears
This obviously possessed by Satan doll (Rosemary's Baby perhaps?) will make everyone within earshot want to leap out a window and plummet to their certain death. But more importantly, it will encourage even a three-year-old to delay motherhood and attend university.
For the wife who is also your best friend, ROBERT
The Classique French Phone available at J.C. Penny's
Can't you picture Napoleon putting this in his throne room or whatever at his estate in Elba?
This dreamy phone is the perfect choice for chatting while lounging in bed, by the pool, or in the tub.
For the busy cook
Amana Microwave Oven $599 at Appliance TV City
You bet it's expensive, but can you put a price tag on time not spent in the kitchen? I don't think so. Say a little prayer that the good scientists at Amana soon develop a blender that also serves drinks and runs to the liquor store when you're out of rum.
For the woman who wants to maintain her figure without sweating
The Slim-Gym $70 at The Broadway
Once again, science will save us all! Near as I can tell, you lie back, stretch yourself out like a little kitty-cat, and the inches melt right off.
For that couple at bridge whom you adore, but don't know well
Johnny Mathis LP "Give Me Your Love For Christmas" $5.98 at Recordland
Johnny Mathis looks dreamy and sounds even dreamier. (He's single, ladies!)
For that pretentious couple at the club that neither you nor your husband can stand, but alas, must stay in their good graces
Seagram's VO Canadian FREE - provided you properly sweet-talk the booze vendor who services your husband's tavern
Get that couple a bottle of whatever the hell these smug pricks are drinking.
For the son of that pretentious couple, whom you saw - clear as day - push down your daughter at the annual Easter Egg Roll and yet he was never disciplined for being a bully
Hideous children's clown lamp $13.49 at J.C. Penny's